The Older I Get, the Weirder Things Are

So I went to the circus the other night, and all I can say is, it sucked. It was complete and utter crap. My kids liked it. I suppose it doesn't take much to seem magical to an eight year old. To me though? It was like all the shine was gone, and in its place was a dark, decrepit, sleaze pit, just waiting to take your money. And yes, before I thought to say money, there was a part of me that wanted to say soul. I can't help it, it was a little back alley creepy. Psycho Circus creepy for any KISS and/or comic geeks out there.

As for the title of this post, I noticed something about myself the other night. Now I'm an asshole, just to be clear. It's not something I'm proud of, and most of the time I can either keep my assholeish (word?) thoughts to myself or at the very least, get by with a socially acceptable, "Oh Shawn, your horrible! <giggle>"  I'm a nice asshole, but an asshole nonetheless. Anyway, as I get older, these cynical assholeish <again ,word?> thoughts seem to be merging with, dare I say it, a hippie like view of the world. And I was always pro-Cartman, anti-hippie. But I don't know what else to call it.

This latest crisis of confidence in my ability to be a thoroughly depressing and bastardly individual happened, you guessed it, at the circus the other night. First things first. I hate PETA. I love animals, but I hate PETA. Back on track, I'm sitting there at the circus, wondering exactly how many kinds of VD the trapeze artists has, when they march out the elephants. I like elephants, I always have; they seem like they just know weird,  interesting, important, things. Things that, when they told you, you'd be all like, "No way! How could I have missed that? Jumbo, you've changed my life forever!" Or something, anyway point is, I like elephants, but aside from the, possibly alcohol induced thought above, I've rarely thought about them. I did Saturday night.

Know what I thought? I thought that the life of a circus elephant sucks balls. Then I felt guilty for paying money to an organization that puts them on display like that. They were going through this act and they just looked pathetic. This circus was in a parking lot in Kenner. The elephants had to kneel on that concrete. Ever kneeled on concrete? It hurts. Imagine weighing a few thousand pounds and kneeling on it. Yeah. So now I want to free the elephants. Along with health care, Palestine, and this country from the Patriot Act. I suppose that really does make me a liberal, which to my family and friends makes me a hippie.  Oh well, I promise to bathe often and not wear patchouli. That'll help some, right?